Tshegofatso Mitchell Gababotse, Last born and the only girl in a family of 5. I am from Serowe currently staying in Gaborone and working as an Office Administrator in Finance Park in a company called Ziden. She goes to Pentecostal Holiness Church, Gaborone where she serves as a worship team member.Her greatest passion is seeing women live up to what is inside of them. She gets an exciting bubbling feeling inside whenever she sees a woman doing something in the church. Her verses to everyone who feel they have lost their blessings and they are troubled are Job 20:15 and Exodus 14:14.Enjoy!
“When are you getting married?” “You look so beautiful” “your boyfriend is one lucky guy”. These are words often heard by sisters and it seems to be the in thing these days. I get surprised at how people are perplexed when I tell them I do not have a boyfriend. Does it sound weird for me not to be in a relationship? I wonder. At times I actually feel I do not even need one. Listen, the truth is I am still learning my worth, still coming into terms with the fact that there is someone who loves me so dearly, someone that thought of me and wanted to die for me.
Someone that loved me so much and felt the need to die for me so that my sins be forgiven to be a new born creation living under His sufficient grace. He had no doubt that I would survive perfectly without seeing Him in the physical for he has wonderful plans for my future. Someone who loves me throughout all seasons. When I mess up and fall,He still loves me. When I become faithless He remains faithful and when I get discouraged He becomes my number one cheer leader who uplifts me. You see I am just a waiting sister.
I am waiting for that one being that would love me as Christ loves the church. I am Waiting for that one that will keep up with my mood swings, my thousand tears for no reason and my sick obsession with chick flicks.
The one who would not complain about my appearance let alone judge me.That one brother who will actually like it when I take a poop whilst he is brushing his teeth, focusing on things of more value would be more encouraging or just generalizing that you would want someone who isn’t fearful of the small and even scary stuff. I am waiting for that brother who will tell me of my beauty because he has seen me on my best and worst days. Someone who would have seen me with my head scarf on and baggy pants but still thinks I am the most beautiful girl to him. I am waiting for that one brother that will not only pray for me but also pray with me without ceasing. A prayer partner . A brother who is the head of the family As Christ has said.
The one who will guide me because falling in love is blinding, for when we do get to that state of love I will be so blinded, I will not even question where we are headed.
I want that guy who will remember his family everywhere he goes.For I am just a waiting sister, waiting for that brother to father my children.
See,I just don’t want any Jock or Jake to be the father of my kids, I want stability. Absolute love is what I am in for. Most importantly a brother who fears the Lord because he knows fearing the Lord is the beginning of all wisdom. Hence, if you are not that brother,please stop wasting my time because I am praying and asking God to bless me with my kind. It will be so kind of you to move away before I think you are the one. Your looks do not qualify you to be the father of my children, charm isn’t going to bring food to the table and swag definitely won’t pay our house bills Don’t get me wrong, I do not need you to pay my bills, but I need someone who I can trust and would give my all to without fear. I am a waiting sister, waiting for that special brother.
Whilst I wait I will be preparing myself both psychologically and spiritually.I will be praying that God helps me to be a good wife to that man He is preparing for me.
I need a man who understands that to get to where I am I had to endure the hardest trials of all time; Fighting loneliness and getting over difficult heartbreaks. Loneliness that would just creep in at night whilst everyone is busy texting their bae or boo and you would be in your bed texting your father. It is not that it is a bad thing to chat with your father because we all need change in our lives. It is difficult when everyone is out there posting wonderful pictures with their honey and you are just seated there posting selfies from 2013 or even recycling old pictures.
It is worth noting that loneliness is such a real thing that cannot be ignored because when it has you it will leave you feeling miserable. All of a sudden everyone around you has a boyfriend, the people you hang with are going away on trips with their loved ones and your friends are getting married, but guess what? You have to help them plan their dream wedding. You also end up giving some of your dream wedding tips and ideas to them and slowly but surely you start eating up on your wedding plans.
Nonetheless you are then expected to keep supporting them and the elders will now start to annoy you with the “when are you getting married?” question. These people do not understand what this question does to one. It reminds you of reality every single time. Absolutely, it rubs in the fact that you woke up single today, you are currently single and if you could change it, you would. Its so overwhelming, sometimes its too much bare. Singlehood is a very tough stage especially for us waiting sisters because we have so much hope in the Lord.
Our hope is that one day we would wake up and all that we have longed for would come into being.
In the meantime, you have to be careful on how you dress because you do not want to be identified as desperate,an attention seeker or even worse a grandmother. If you dress classy the guys get intimidated and feel you might come off as the strong type. The struggle is real for sisters and it is something we do not want to talk about. Most of the time we choose not to discuss it in length,simply because it is not easy.You meet this guy and he becomes the sweetest thing that has ever happened to you until one day he reveals his true black and yellow strips. He tells you he does not like it when you wear pumps and so he insists that you wear heels all the time. Shocking as it sounds, I wonder; Do guys even understand the pain of wearing those things and having to kill that Tyra Banks walk everyday?
To all the brothers out there “We struggle , we go through all these things. If I am going to sacrifice all of that then you better be the one I have been waiting for.
You better be the one who is worth all of this.
This is to all the sisters out there who are waiting patiently just as I am and all the sisters out there who feel the pinch of being single and not appreciated. This is To all the brothers that want to understand what women go through.
I Hope It Helps You!
With Love, TG